The 5th Researcher
by nnwm
Summary: As Gideon Cahill's research comes to an end, he discovers that his friends may soon be foes... Please read and comment, my first story. [PUT ON INFINITE HOLD]


**Chapter 1- The Gate**

**(A/N: Feel free to comment. This is my first fanfic, and I'll try my best to make it good. Please comment on anything you can improve. Also, feel free to flame me (whatever that means). Thank you for taking time to read this…I know Vespers Rising is now out, but I took a while plotting the story out, so my story should be relatively unchanged by it (in terms of what you read), but, there will be some conflicts with the real series. So, we must assume, while reading this piece of FanFiction, at least, that Into the Gauntlet was the last book of the 39 clues series.)**

**(A/N 2- Historical notes: Some of the words used by the characters have their origins in a later time. This will be explained... Also, I know that some inventions described apparently did not exist at the time. This will also be explained. For those of you who believe that Alexander the Great did not exist... That is an entirely different matter.)**

A small ship sailed through the dark ocean, with a raging storm close behind it. On board, two men and two women valiantly kept the sailboat moving, the ten-foot high waves getting closer and closer. Although the people looked half-dead, with their pale skin and dark, sleep-deprived eyes, their clothes showed signs of great wealth, their fine cloaks and dresses adorned with precious jewels and metals.

As yet another large wave pounded against the tiny ships hull, the larger of the two men bellowed through the howling wind: "Thy headsail is tearing! How much further till landfall?"

The smaller of the two women scurried across the deck of the small ship, and took a small telescope out from a heavy oak chest. She quickly unfolded it, and looking up at the stars in the night, deduced: "We'll pass the Gate in twenty or so minutes, but I fear the storm shall surpass us before then!"

The other man, thin and lean, smiled a twisted smile, and muttered: "Gideon**(A/N: If you haven't guessed, Gideon is Gideon Cahill)** has always liked privacy, hasn't he? Typical of him to live on one of thy most hard-to-reach locations in thy world. Little does he know his 'research' shall come to an end soon… Yes, I daresay an abrupt end…"

The other woman, who was managing some ropes on the starboard side of the ship, called out: "I see the Gate! It's just over the horizon."

The thin man stared at the woman who had just cried out, and asked her with a mocking tone as cold as steel: "Lady Guinevere Matutinus how sure are you about that? The last time you uttered those words, you had mistaken the Gate for a collection of sharp rocks, had you not?"

Guinevere, composed as ever, retorted: "Well, Damian,**(A/N: Yes, Damian as in Damian Vesper)** are you that much better? I heard that your cunning brain was recently tricked by an old fellow, from Lord Tannin Mascison here."

Tannin, the larger man, was bulky and strong. He instantly burst into laughter, hollering between his bouts of laughter, amidst the drumming rain: "_Vespers, the smartest, cruelest, and best_. Which is why they give money for the poor!"

Immediately, Damian looked at Tannin with such ferocity that his face froze, in mid-laugh, and he slowly backed away from the Vesper. Speaking softly, his voice somehow cut through the storm's din, Damian replied: " If that is the case, then explain how that scum managed to get himself bankrupt the next day then?"

Tannin was about to say something, when suddenly, a huge wave pushed the small ship forward, through a large stone arch, and then the boat lurched forward, and the weary travelers were in front of the Gate. Rocked back and forth by the sudden deceleration, the members on board the ship nearly fell down, barely grasping the edges of the ship to avoid a careless slip..

The Gate was a large gate, made of pure gold and silver, bearing the symbols of Alchemy on it. There were intricate carvings of numerous animals, plants, and chemicals, all of them arranged in such a fashion so that the entire thing, when viewed from afar, looked like padlock.

Although the Gate was one of the most glorious and magnificent things on Earth in that time, the travelers ignored it as if it was a common sight. Almost like it was a regular job, the four people each pressed a small key into the center of the door, and after rotating it several times, a clicking sound was heard, and the Gate slowly opened.

Inside the Gate was a sheltered cove, a safe haven from the fast approaching storm. There were several lanterns, each inside a glass cage, protecting it's fierce heat from weary travelers. The four unloaded their belongings, equipment and a small chest onto a cart about 5 meters inland, and began inspecting the 20 meter high cove, looking for something.

Four pairs of keen eyes scanned the walls, floor, and space around them, unaware of a fifth presence. In the end, it was Damien who spotted the curled up paper message, another gray ring amongst the many already up on the wall. Quickly pulling it out, he read the short message, written in Gideon's unmistakably fancy script: "The 5th Sea of Homonyms, at (T=85,H=523.5m)."

Looking at the other three men and women clustered around him, Damien shrugged his shoulders, although his face remained impassive. Alacrity, the shorter of the two women, spoke a few seconds later: "Given that a homonym is a set of words with different meanings, I would guess that Sea and C are supposed to be Homonyms in this case. But how would C make any sense?"

Guinevere, upon hearing this, gasped: "Alas, I understand now! What Gideon means for us to do is for me to sing a C interval in 5ths, starting with a hertz of 532.5, meaning that is also beginning on C5., as the 'H=' part must represent hertz..but what would the T stand for?"

Damien chuckled softly, understanding dawning on his face. He instantaneously responded, recomposing his features to one of bitter criticism: "Oh dear... it seems as if we've forgotten about the tempo." With that, he smirked, and motioned for Guinevere to continue.

Taking a deep breath, Guinevere began singing, her voice carrying to the highest corners of the cove. Keeping a steady pace, she slowly sang up to the highest note, but nothing happened.

Tannin, looking around, obviously bored, found out that the very top of the cove seemed to be trembling. Small rocks were shifted loose, and he thought he heard a faint crashing sound. Were they destroying the mechanism that would get them onto the island? He called out, "Stop!", but it was too late. With a great crash, the wall on the top of the cove seemed to fall off, but it shattered on the ground right in front of the four.

Alacrity, curious, quickly examined one of the smaller shards that had broken off of the main piece. "Sugar glass," she exclaimed, "the broken glass that was on the wall on top must have been created so that it shattered upon the final note! This must be our exit!"

Damien nodded in agreement, and grabbed a rope and tossed it to Tannin. Tannin deftly caught it, and hurled it up onto one of the many protruding rocks near the top of the cove. He quickly began climbing up, and while Alacrity and Guinevere watched him with great intensity, Damien quietly sneaked back, and pocketed a piece of the sugar glass. As Tannin turned around to shout something, Damien quickly strode forward, feigning interest.

Tannin

**(A/N- About the fact that Alexander the Great didn't exist-**

**Lemma 1. All horses are the same colour (by induction).**

**Proof. It is obvious that one horse is the same colour. Let us assume the proposition P(k) that k horses are the same colour and use this to imply that k + 1 horses are the same colour. Given the set of k + 1 horses, we remove one horse; then the remaining k horses are the same colour, by hypothesis. We remove another horse and replace the first; the k horses, by hypothesis, are again the same colour. We repeat this until by exhaustion the k + 1 sets of k horses have each been shown to be the same colour. It follows then that since every horse is the samecolour as every other horse, P(k) entails P(k + 1). But since we have shown P(1) to be true, P is true for all succeeding values of k, that is, all horses are the same colour.**

**Theorem 1. Every horse has an infinite number of legs. (Proof by intimidation).**

**Proof. Horses have an even number of legs. Behind they have two legs and in front they have fore legs. This makes six legs, which is certainly an odd number of legs for a horse. But the only number that is both odd and even is infinity. Therefore horses have an infinite number of legs. Now to show that this is general, suppose that somewhere there in a horse with a finite number of legs. But that is a horse of a another colour, and by the lemma that does not exist.**

**Corollary 1. Everything is the same colour.**

**Proof. The proof of lemma 1 does not depend at all on the nature of the object under consideration. The predicate of the antecedent of the universally-quantified conditional `For all x, if x is a horse, then x is the same colour,' namely `is a horse' may be generalized to `is anything' without affecting the validity of the proof; hence, `for all x, if x is anything, x is the same colour.**

**Corollary 2. Everything is white.**

**Proof. If a sentential formula in x is logically true, then any particular substitution instance of it is a true sentence. In particular then: `for all x, if x is an elephant, then x is the same colour' is true. Now it is manifestly axiomatic that white elephants exist (for proof by blatant assertion consult Mark Twain `The Stolen White Elephant'). Therefore all elephants are white. By corollary 1 everything is white.**

**Theorem 2. Alexander the Great did not exist and he had an infinite number of limbs.**

**Proof. We prove this theorem in two parts. First we note the obvious fact that historians always tell the truth (for historians always take a stand, and therefore they cannot lie). Hence we have the historically true sentence, `If Alexander the Great existed, then he rode a black horse Bucephalus.' But we know by corollary 2 everything is white; hence Alexander could not have ridden a black horse. Since the consequent of the conditional is false, in order for the whole statement to be true, the antecedent must be false. Hence Alexander the Great did not exist.**

**We have also the historically true statement that Alexander was warned by an oracle that he would meet death if he crossed a certain river. He had two legs; and `fore-warned is four-armed.' This gives him six limbs, an even number, which is certainly an odd number of limbs for a man. Now the only number which is even and odd is infinity; hence Alexander had an infinite number of limbs. We have thus proved that Alexander the Great did not**

**exist and that he had an infinite number of limbs. )**


End file.
